Oh no... Studies

What motivates one to study?? What exactly?? I have been a student all my life and after all these years, I am still flummoxed by the question. I have tried multiple times to put forth the same question in front of the toppers that I know, you know, just to get a hint of the process that might allow me to study and secure reasonable percentage, if not top every exam. But a magician never reveals his secrets, right?? And my topper friends have done the same; they have ducked and dodged this question and I am left with no options but to lie there and procrastinate about studying.

I have planned a lot, these past years, to have a regular timetable of sorts. But I procrastinate with professionalism, and have never come close to implementing my over-ambitious timetables. And I do not regret my failure to force myself into a regular study mode until a day before the exams loom over the head. I am of the view that off-days, preparatory leaves or holidays in general have done more harm towards studying than tight deadlines. Contrary to the normal reaction of my friends on hearing about holidays between exams, I tend to fear those holidays. I work better under pressure, so does a large part of the student community. Given a complete year to prepare, we won’t pick up our books until a day or two before the scheduled exams. Defying all logic, we all somehow manage to sneak through and snatch the required passing marks from under the examiner’s noses. This success goes to our head and we start trusting our intelligence, which in reality is a different case altogether.

I want to study, regularly. At least I want the strength to stare into a pile of books for hours and squeeze out couple of hours of productive output from it. A lot of my ambitions rely on the mark-sheet and so far, it is not very impressive. I lack motivation and the will. I have never been a very dedicated student and with the indications, I will never be. I lose interest in anything if I am compelled to do it. I have my interests but when you assign an examination at the end of it, something goes awfully wrong. Like everyone else, I love a good, impressive mark-sheet but electronics comes in the way.

Damn you internet, and laptops, and cellphone. Just kidding, I love you all.