Thursday, 9 January 2014

Girls


Girls – a mere five letter word hides behind a veil, a mystery unresolved till date. They are one of the most mysterious creatures ever to walk the planet. You cannot understand girls. That tingly little feeling you get when you think you have understood your girl, is the biggest deception there is.
The creator of the universe didn’t dare to think beyond the IIMs, hence missed out on the honor of being an IIPM-ian. The lack of His management expertise is evident in the way He managed the project of populating Earth. A major technical glitch resulted in the most mysterious species ever known – Girls. Some features are sure creative. But the guy who programmed their brains must have been some inexperienced fresher. He unknowingly created an unsolvable, uncrack-able puzzle for the rest of humanity to solve. As far as the mysteries are concerned, they are mysterious in themselves. They can’t be categorized, thus multiplying the complexity. There is no practical or theoretically possible starting point and no end to that. Every new definition challenges the previous one.
The idea that everything can be understood, solved and remodeled goes down the drain when it comes to the creatures we are discussing. Girls are an exception to every possible theory in the galaxy. One day you meet the perfect girl. She laughs with you, she is comfortable enough to cry in front of you, she trusts you with her deepest secrets. Then someday you ask her out on a date and BAM… you have a sister now. Or as an equally painful alternative, you are sentenced to friendzone for life. I mean what’s up with that ladies ??
Understanding a girl is like downloading a 1 GB file on a painstaking broadband connection over two weeks because, let’s say  you really like that file, and after 99.7% success, the Gods of downloading get pissed off and you are left with nothing, nothing at all. You are expected to have a doctorate in girlology, without a lecture. And here is the catch – just like human fingerprints and zebra’s stripes, every girl is different from the next. All your studies and research on a subject holds no validity over the next one.
Being with a girl (girl-friend or a girlfriend), you are required to be nothing short of Sherlock’s caliber in interpreting the slightest clues you get, spread over months apart it goes without saying. And my friend, the journey is nothing less than a treasure hunt.
Anyway, with all the love and respect I could muster, thank you for the mystery of a lifetime ladies. I would now like to retire to my chamber of secrets, with my solitude.
The possible reason why this article, as a whole, makes no sense is because…well, look at the topic, isn’t it obvious??
[It is immoral and unconstitutional to throw stones at the writer after this article.]

Also published on the awesome site Campusghanta.

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